Over the past two years Troy and I have lost three Grandfathers. I never really experienced a close family death till last summer with my Grandpa Hafen passing. Troy, on the other hand is some what experienced in this category.
It's been interesting to see how we've reacted and how over the years the reactions have changed. With Troy's Grandpa Hovland (2011) he was sad, but other than that really didn't know how to else to react it seemed. He wasn't terribly close to him, I think what hurt more was seeing the man that raised him; who is tough and not very emotional, break down. Something he'd never witnessed first hand. He went to the funeral in Minnesota and spent some quality time with his family. Accepting what happened and moving on.
With my Grandpa Hafen, Troy was a rock for me. I kept it together till we were at the funeral home and I saw him, which is pretty darn good for being 3 months pregnant at the time. I kept trying to do things, I didn't want to sit or really face what was happening. I kept an eye on the other cousins, I took pictures, I talked about anything but Grandpa. The next day we were cleaning out the house, I did some heavy lifting despite what I was told, still not wanting to face what had happened. I didn't really face it till a few months ago, I picked up the phone to call Grandpa to ask him a gardening question and the number was disconnected. Then I remembered why.
|Grandpa Hafen in his Garden of Eden|
Then last night Grandpa Rick passed away, Troy's dad's dad. He was opinionated, stubborn, and stuck in his ways. But he was a sweet funny, guy. We had a joke going on that he had girlfriends that came over while his wife was out and every time we talked I'd ask how they were doing. He'd laugh and say they were fine and pass the phone along. He was a man of few words but always made it clear what he wanted. He'd been in the hospital 6 months, it was Heavenly Father's mercy that made it a peaceful passing with his wife by his side.
I was heart broken to find I have no pictures of him.
Through all these we've known of The Plan of Salvation, that Heavenly Father has a plan that we don't always understand or agree with, but we know in the back of our minds it's all for the best and that he knows what he is doing.
We thank Him that we've been able to know such valiant souls. While we could have the point of view that these influential men have been ripped away from us; we choose to take a different point of view. We choose to see it as they're mission in this life had been fulfilled. That they had done all they had been asked to do, and Heavenly Father had them all depart surrounded by the ones they loved. And now, they watch and protect us from above.
"O God, who holdest all souls in life; and callest them unto thee as seemeth best: we give them back, dear God, to thee who gavest them to us. But as thou didst not lose them in the giving, so we do not lose them by their return. For not as the world giveth, givest thou, O Lord of souls: that which thou givest thou takest not away: for life is eternal, and love is immortal, and death is only the horizon, and the horizon is nothing save the limit of our sight." --Rossiter W Raymond